It was too much
by HeyaIsLove
Summary: Santana's parents kicked her out when she came out to them. Her abuela too. She can't deal with everything that's going on with her life. And she thinks that this time Brittany's not gonna be able to help her.


**Hello! Okay so this is my first time writing in English, my language is Spanish, so I'm sorry for my mistakes.**

**Anyway, enjoy!**

Santana grabbed the cutter, she hold it in her hand for long minutes and just stare at it.

That was it. That cutter was going to be the one ending her life.

She felt empty, her parents told her to leave the house when she told them she was a lesbian. Her grandma kicked her out too.

She had nothing left, except from Brittany, her girlfriend.

She loved her so much, and she knew Brittany loved her too, but the pain was bigger, and she wanted it to end.

Normally she would cuddle with Brittany and everything would be better, but not this time, this time she didn't know what to do to make the pain stop.

She took her phone and dialed Brittany but she didn't answer. She wanted to hear her voice one more time, maybe have a small conversation before…doing it…

She heard the voicemail so she decided to leave a message.

"Hey Britt" she paused "umm it's me Santana. I just want you to know..." she paused again "that I love you" tears started falling down her cheek, she was crying hard "I love you, okay? I love you more than anything. You mean everything to me." she couldn't stop crying "Oh god, I'm so sorry Britt, I really am, I just can't stand this, I hope you understand " she took a deep breath and continued "I'm never going to forget you, I hope you don't forget me either, and this have nothing to do with you, it's not your fault, I want you to know that"  
"I guess that all I have to say... Bye Britt-Britt, I love you and I always will" se hanged up and looked down at her cell phone wallpaper, it was a picture of her and Brittany, she couldn't help the tears that were falling. She threw the phone to the bed and grabbed the cutter again.

She slowly did a cut in her right wrist, the blood quickly started coming out.  
It hurted her little bit.

She did another cut and a few more, then she grabbed the cutter with her other hand and cut her left wrist she kept on doing it until she felt really weak, and suddenly she was in a pool of blood.

She lay in her bed and closed her eyes, she thought of Brittany, _her Brittany_, she saw a lot of images of her, both of them, together. She imagined that Brittany was singing to her, she wanted to die with a picture of Brittany so she just kept her in her mind while she was feeling weaker and weaker, she found that it was hard to breath.

Then she heard someone opening her door. She opened her eyes and saw a blurry Brittany walking in.

"Hey San..." she said happily but as soon as she saw Santana her face changed. She rushed to Santana side and held her in her arms.

"San what did you do?" she practically screamed. She knew it was a stupid question, but it was the only thing she managed to say. "Someone call 911!" she said as loud as she could.

"Britt..." Santana said really low, she was smiling because now she was able to see her girlfriend for one last time.

"Shhh. San stay silence, okay? Just keep your eyes open" she said softly, Brittany was now covered in blood too, she held Santana tight and really close to her.

Ms. Lopez appeared in the room "911? Why?" she said but she shut up. Brittany looked at her.

"For God sake, call 911! She's fucking dying" Brittany yelled to the woman.

Santana's mother ran next to both girls "Mija..." she got out of the room and

Santana could hear her yelling stuff at her father and calling 911.

"God baby, why did you do this?" Brittany said crying "I love you, please don't leave me, please San, don't leave me"

Santana now hated herself, for making Brittany cry. "Britt it's not your fault" she said in a whisper "I love you too" she continued.

"Oh San, why would you even think of doing this?" she said still crying

"My family doesn't love me anymore... And…it hurts" she said in a much lower whisper.

Santana felt like she was going to pass out or maybe die, she didn't know the difference. She just felt really weak, she couldn't breathe well and her eyes were slowly closing.

"Of course they love you San, you didn't have to do this!" Brittany kept on crying, her world wasn't spinning anymore, seeing Santana like that and just thinking about losing her was killed her.

"They hate me for who ...who I am" Santana couldn't speak now. Her body was weak.

"They don't, and I don't. I love you with my entire heart baby. Please please please don't leave me. I need you San, don't do this to me" She held Santana tighter

"It was too much for me to handle… I'm... Sorry" she said closing her eyes

"Don't! Don't close your eyes!" she said panicking and trying to open Santana's eyes.

Santana opened them again.

"Good, keep them open, stay with me, okay baby?" she said, Santana was pale, she rubbed her cheek... "You're so beautiful, and I love you so much"

"They're almost here" Santana's mother ran in the room and sit next to Santana and Brittany.

"Santana, we're sorry. Be strong now, we don't want to lose you, you're our daughter and we love you no matter what"

Brittany wanted to punch her in the face, she was a bitch to her daughter and she realized she loved her when she was dying.

Santana didn't hear her mother, her eyes begin to close again, and this time she couldn't open them again, she thought of Brittany, she didn't want to leave her, because she saw how sad Brittany was, and now she leaving her alone.

"No! No! No! San! Open your eyes please!" Brittany heard sirens _'the paramedics'_ she thought "Open them please! Don't go! Please stay with me San, I just can't lose you"

Santana stopped breathing, and Brittany felt her world breaking.

"God no, God no! Please San! Please don't die! I need you, San. Fuck! Open your eyes! I need to see them again." She screamed really loudly with tears that just couldn't stop coming.

Mrs. Lopes was just sitting there, not moving.

The paramedics came in the room and got near Santana, they started checking her, one of them grabbed Brittany and pulled her back, Brittany just stood there in silence, watching them trying to bring Santana back.

"we got her back!" one said.

Brittany was covered in Santana's blood, she didn't mind. She just wanted her back, to hold her and kiss her.

"We're losing her, crap, we're losing her again"

A silence filled the room. And it was then when Brittany knew. Santana was dead.

"No..." she said walking to Santana. She was her face, it was pale, lifeless, but to Brittany, she was still beautiful "No! San! You can't die! You told me we were always going to be together! You promised me San! We linked pinkies, you can't break a promise..." she grabbed her hands, they were so cold.

The paramedics chose to ignore the scene and they started filling some papers and one walked to Brittany.

"We're really sorry for your loss but we need to take her to the hospital now"

"Why? She's already dead" she said rudely with tears in her eyes.

"Routine"

"This is your fault!" She suddenly yelled to Santana's mother "You told her to leave! You made her think you didn't love her anymore!"

"My daughter just died. Don't you dare telling me it's my fault" she answered angry.

Brittany couldn't believe Santana's mom was so calm, like nothing just happened, she wanted to yell "So now she's your daughter? Funny because I remember you told her she wasn't your daughter anymore and to leave this house. Well be happy because now she won't be here"

"Madam we need you to fill this" the paramedic told Ms. Lopez and handed her a few papers before she could answer Brittany.

Brittany started crying again, hugged Santana and bury her head in her shoulder, she stayed like that for some minutes. "I love you San, and I'm never going to forget you. You're the love of my life" then she started singing softly to Santana's ear "For you there'll be no more crying, For you the sun will be shining" and with all the pain that she was feeling she sang one last verse "And I love you, I love you, I love you like never before"

**Thanks for reading! **

**Please let me know what you think! I would really appreciate it.**


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